Mapping Your Depression (Depression Mini Series – Part 2)
Episode 20: Spotify | Apple Podcasts | YouTube
View transcript on Buzzsprout
Dissociation isn’t a failure—it’s a defense. In this second episode of our three-part series on depression, Amanda dives deep into the experience of dissociation, how it relates to shutdown, and why understanding your personal depression map can help you navigate and heal.
What We Cover in This Episode
- What dissociation really is (and how it differs from delusion)
- Why dissociation is a form of mental flight
- How shutdown manifests physically, emotionally, and behaviorally
- The role of energy conservation and pain reduction
- How to map your unique depression experience using 4 key categories
Understanding Dissociation Through a Nervous System Lens
Dissociation is one of the most misunderstood symptoms of depression. It’s not just spacing out or scrolling your phone—it’s a nervous system state, rooted in overwhelm and survival. Formally, dissociation is a mental disconnection from thoughts, feelings, or surroundings. But functionally? It’s mental flight when physical flight isn’t an option.
Your nervous system makes this call, not your conscious mind. When life feels unmanageable, your body opts to stay present physically but disconnect emotionally.
Key Distinctions: Depersonalization vs. Derealization
- Depersonalization: feeling disconnected from yourself (your body, thoughts, or identity)
- Derealization: feeling detached from the world around you (like you’re watching a movie or inside a fog)
These are protective mechanisms, not signs of delusion. If you still know reality is real (even if it doesn’t feel like it), you’re grounded—just disconnected.
The Shutdown State: Why the Body Pulls the Plug
Dissociation and depression both occur in the red zone of the nervous system ladder, also known as the dorsal vagal state. This state triggers two key physiological goals:
- Conserve energy
- Minimize pain
This is why your system feels flat, foggy, or numb. Think of the gazelle being chased by a lion: when fight or flight fail, it collapses into freeze. It doesn’t choose to play dead. Its nervous system decides.
You’re no different. When your life feels like too much, your body chooses shutdown. It’s not weakness. It’s wiring.
Mapping Your Depression: A Personal Practice
To shift out of shutdown, you first need to recognize it. That’s where mapping comes in.
Amanda walks listeners through how to map their red zone experience using four categories:
- Sensations: What does your body feel like? (e.g., heavy, numb, cold, slow breath)
- Emotions: What feelings arise? (e.g., hopelessness, apathy, loneliness)
- Thoughts: What do you believe in that moment? (e.g., “What’s the point?”, “I’m invisible”)
- Behaviors: What do you do or avoid? (e.g., isolate, scroll, go silent)
Creating this personal map helps you:
- Catch red zone signals earlier
- Choose more effective regulation tools
- Respond with compassion, not shame
Want to get started? Download Amanda’s free Mapping Your Red Zone Worksheet.
Three Tangible Takeaways
- Dissociation Is Defense, Not Defect: It’s a mental escape when your body can’t run. Recognize it for what it is—a sign your system needs support, not shame.
- Shutdown Conserves Energy and Blocks Pain: Depression isn’t laziness or lack of willpower. Your body is protecting you by numbing and slowing down.
- Know Your Red Zone: Mapping your depression gives you personal insight into how shutdown shows up for you and helps you interrupt it earlier.
Looking for more personalized support?
- Book a FREE discovery call for RESTORE, our 1:1 anxiety & depression coaching program (HSA/FSA eligible & includes comprehensive bloodwork)
- Join me inside the Regulated Living Membership, a mental health membership and nervous system healing space (sliding scale pricing available)
- Join my Release Class – Monthly guided nervous system regulation class
- Order my book, Healing Through the Vagus Nerve today!
- Download free resources here
*Want me to talk about something specific on the podcast? Let me know HERE.
Disclaimer: This article is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or qualified mental health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.
