Three Ways to Manage Stressors (Stress Bucket Series – Part 3)
Episode 39: Spotify | Apple Podcasts | YouTube
View transcript on Buzzsprout
This is part 3 of our 4-part series on the Stress Bucket exercise—a practical framework we use with clients to help them regulate their nervous system and build more sustainable lives. If you missed the first two parts, Episode 37 covers your stress bucket assessment, then Episode 38 moves on to talk about auditing your stress load.
Today we shift into action: how to manage your stress day-to-day. Because once you know what’s filling your bucket and how full it is, the next step is figuring out how to keep it from overflowing. And that starts with understanding three key tools: how to poke holes in your bucket, scoop water out, and eventually expand your capacity altogether.
Click here to download the Stress Bucket Workbook Freebie!
What We Cover in This Episode
- The three ways to manage stress: poke holes, scoop water, and expand capacity
- Why daily stress relief practices matter (and what counts)
- The difference between reactive and proactive regulation
- What baseline vs daily stressors are and why they matter
- Four somatic tools to reduce stress immediately
Why Stress Management Isn’t Optional
Managing your stress isn’t about becoming a superhuman who never gets overwhelmed. It’s about building a lifestyle where your body, mind, and relationships can thrive. Without active stress management, chronic overload leads to nervous system dysregulation—showing up as anxiety, depression, chronic fatigue, or burnout.
Amanda uses the analogy of a sprained ankle: if you’re doing all the “right” physical therapy but then running three miles every day, that injury won’t heal. Similarly, nervous system healing requires more than adding tools—it requires reducing load. This episode unpacks how to do both.
The Three Ways to Manage Your Stress Bucket
Stress is like water being poured into a bucket. Too much in, and it spills over. Here are three ways to manage that load:
1. Poke Holes in the Bucket
These are your somatic and regulation practices that let stress out in small ways. Amanda calls these “reactive regulation” tools. They help you respond to activation in the moment. Examples include:
- Deep breathing
- Color spotting
- Neck massage
- Legs up the wall
With time, these can become “proactive” tools, built into your daily life so that you’re not waiting until you’re already overwhelmed to de-stress.
2. Scoop Out the Water
This happens through editing stressors and doing deeper healing work. Think of it as:
- Trauma resolution
- Inner child work
- Belief repatterning
- Letting go of perfectionism or people-pleasing
You can’t do this deep work if your bucket is already full. That’s why Amanda emphasizes starting with capacity and regulation before diving into deeper healing.
3. Get a Bigger Bucket
This is capacity building: increasing your system’s ability to tolerate stress. Practices like:
- Heart rate variability training
- Cold exposure (safely)
- Breathwork
- Regular exercise
- Co-regulation with safe people
This step comes later in the journey, once your baseline feels more stable and you’re not in survival mode 24/7.
Baseline vs Daily Stressors
Amanda breaks down the difference:
- Baseline stressors: Historical or habitual stress inputs you wake up with. Examples: childhood trauma, poor sleep, cluttered home, chronic illness, overworking.
- Daily stressors: What life throws at you each day—emails, traffic, parenting, unexpected challenges.
If your baseline stress is already high, daily stressors will overflow your bucket fast. That’s why some people feel overwhelmed every morning—they’re waking up with a nearly full bucket.
The goal isn’t to eliminate stress. It’s to create enough buffer space that your system can handle the normal ups and downs of life without constant collapse.
Four Tools to Help You De-Stress Today
Amanda offers these four practical tools to poke holes in your stress bucket and regulate your system right now:
- Deep Breathing – Slows heart rate, stimulates the vagus nerve, supports parasympathetic shift.
- Color Spotting – Helps shift visual processing, activates safety cues through peripheral vision.
- Neck Massage – Stimulates vagus nerve endings for fast calming effects.
- Legs Up the Wall – Redistributes blood flow, calms the system, great end-of-day reset.
Try one or all of these. Track what feels effective by noticing shifts in tension, breath, and presence. The goal isn’t to do them perfectly—it’s to start building your personal toolbox.
Three Tangible Takeaways
- Managing stress = building buffer zones. Whether through tools, edits, or capacity-building, your goal is to create more space in your system.
- Start with poking holes. Get good at the small stuff before diving into deep edits or big biohacks.
- Your stress management plan should be yours. Use the tools that feel good. Leave the rest. This is about regulation, not rigidity.
Looking for more personalized support?
- Book a FREE discovery call for RESTORE, our 1:1 anxiety & depression coaching program (HSA/FSA eligible & includes comprehensive bloodwork)
- Join me inside the Regulated Living Membership, a mental health membership and nervous system healing space (sliding scale pricing available)
- Join my Release Class – Monthly guided nervous system regulation class
- Order my book, Healing Through the Vagus Nerve today!
- Download free resources here
*Want me to talk about something specific on the podcast? Let me know HERE.
Disclaimer: This article is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or qualified mental health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.
