How to Come Out of a Shut Down State

Have you ever found yourself feeling completely disconnected, numb, unmotivated, depressed, or unable to move forward? Perhaps you feel like you’re watching life through a foggy window, your energy depleted, your motivation gone. If so, you may be experiencing what’s known in polyvagal theory as a “shutdown state” or “dorsal vagal shutdown.”

This state isn’t just “feeling low” or “being lazy” — it’s your nervous system’s protective response to overwhelming stress or perceived danger. And while it can serve an important biological purpose, getting stuck here can be incredibly frustrating and isolating.

The good news? There are effective ways of working with your nervous system to help you feel safe enough to come back online, to move up the nervous system ladder, without forcing or faking it. It’s about understanding what your system needs, offering compassion, and then, when the time is right, gently and sometimes more actively, re-conneting and re-mobilizing your system. This guide explores gentle first steps and the often-overlooked role of movement in truly moving towards more regulation.

(ps. if you’d rather tune in than read, click here for one of my most downloaded podcast episodes on this topic)

Understanding the Shutdown State

Before we talk about coming out of a shutdown state, it’s important to understand what’s happening in your body when you’re in one.

Developed by Dr. Stephen Porges, Polyvagal Theory maps our nervous system into three primary states (learn more in this post):

1. Ventral Vagal (The Green Zone): Our state of safety, connection, and social engagement. We feel present, calm, and open.
2. Sympathetic Activation (The Yellow Zone): Our “fight-or-flight” response. We’re mobilized, anxious, perhaps angry or scared, ready to face or flee a threat.
3. Dorsal Vagal Shutdown (The Red Zone): Our most primitive defense. When fight or flight aren’t possible or have been exhausted, the system may “play dead.” This is characterized by numbness, exhaustion, disconnection, a feeling of collapse, or profound immobilization.

Interestingly, your body’s first response to a threat is usually activation (Yellow Zone) – to escape or confront it. But when stressors are relentless, inescapable, or simply too much for too long, the nervous system hits a point of overwhelm to the point of shut down.

The Paradox of Recovery: Why Forcing an Initial Shift Can Backfire

When we find ourselves in shutdown, a common instinct is to try and “fix it” by sheer willpower – pushing ourselves to exercise, socialize, or be productive. But this often backfires. As a client once shared, “I tried practices to connect to my body, but when my mind came back online, I got intrusive thoughts, felt more fear, and ended up even more numb.”

This is because if your system still perceives a need for shutdown (due to exhaustion, ongoing threat, or unresolved trauma), trying to yank it into activation can feel like another threat, causing it to retreat further. Imagine trying to drag someone who is utterly exhausted to a high-energy party – it’s likely to be counterproductive.

Step 1: Meeting Your System Where It Is – Compassion and Safety First

Your nervous system isn’t shutting down to spite you; it’s trying to protect you because it’s either too depleted or the perceived threat load is too high. The first, most crucial step is not to “fix” but to support.

Instead of asking “How do I get out of this?”, gently inquire, “What does my system need to feel even a tiny bit safer or more supported right where I am?” It’s in honoring this current state that your nervous system begins to gather the resources and sense of safety to eventually move towards regulation at its own pace.

Gentle Practices for Initial Safety & Connection (When You’re Deep in Shutdown):

When you’re in the depths of shutdown, the focus is on connection before mobilization. These practices are about offering micro-moments of care:

1. Mindful Self-Talk & Gentle Touch: Place a hand on your heart or belly. Silently offer words like, “I’m here. This is okay. It’s okay to rest.” Feel your breath, however shallow. You’re not trying to change anything, just bringing compassion.
2. Warmth & Soothing Water: A warm bath or shower can be deeply soothing. The warmth initiates a healthy parasympathetic response. Consider calming scents like lavender. Allow yourself to lean into the need for rest while adding nurturing care.
3. Weighted Comfort: The gentle, distributed pressure of a weighted blanket can feel like a safe, grounding embrace, especially if a comforting person isn’t available.
4. Dampen Sensory Overload: Shutdown often occurs when we’re sensorily overwhelmed. Quit scrolling social media. Use noise-canceling headphones or listen to very gentle nature sounds (soft rain, distant waves – avoid anything too stimulating). Dim the lights. Put on loose comfy clothes. This says to your system, “You can stay here; I’ll help make it feel a bit safer.”
5. Acknowledge the Protective Intent: Validate the state by saying something like, “My nervous system is trying to keep me safe. It makes sense that I need this break given everything.”
6. Permission-Giving Affirmations: Offer yourself statements like, “I’m allowed to rest fully,” “It’s okay to disconnect when I need to,” “I am safe to be right where I am now.”
7. Seek easy company: This could be from a friend, a pet, or even characters of a well loved tv show.

Step 2: Titration – The Gentle Art of Re-Emergence

Titration means taking tiny, incremental steps. Once you’ve offered consistent compassion and validation, you might introduce micro-doses of gentle mobilization, always checking in with how your system responds:

• Subtle Movement: Gently rocking or swaying in place.
• Mindful Breathing: Noticing your breath, perhaps extending the exhale just slightly if it feels okay.
• Moving Body Scan: Slowly bringing awareness to different parts of your body, noticing sensations without judgment.
• A slow stretch or easy walk around the room, up to get some water or around the block.

If any of these feel overwhelming, or if your system “doubles down” on shutdown, that’s a cue to pause, retreat to more basic comfort, and honor that need.

Step 3: The Movement Nuance – When Your Fatigue Actually Needs Action

Here’s where things get nuanced. While acute shutdown from overwhelm demands gentleness and rest, sometimes a prolonged state of low energy, fatigue, or “functional freeze” isn’t just about needing more rest—it’s about needing movement.

Many of us live in a state of being cognitively overstimulated and physically understimulated. Our brains are constantly processing, while our bodies remain largely sedentary. This mismatch, where our minds work much harder than our bodies, is a recipe for symptoms like chronic fatigue, insomnia, anxiety, restlessness, digestive issues, low mood, and lack of motivation. This isn’t a “disorder”; it’s often straightforward physiology—our bodies are designed to move and expend energy.

We might think we’re resting by scrolling on our phones or watching TV, but this is often “fake rest.” True rest involves stepping away from stimuli and allowing your nervous system to genuinely downshift. If you’re engaging in a lot of “fake rest” and still feeling drained, it might be a sign.

If, after tending to initial safety needs and perhaps engaging in some gentle titration, you still find yourself in a persistent state of low energy, consider this: Could your “burnout” or fatigue actually be, in part, from a lack of sufficient physical movement?

This isn’t about pushing yourself when you’re acutely overwhelmed. But if you’ve been in a low-energy state for a while, and your primary impulse is still just to lay down despite not feeling truly rested, it’s worth an experiment:

• Start Small: This doesn’t mean hitting the gym for an hour. It could be establishing a habit of a 5-10 minute brisk walk, dancing to one song, a few simple exercises.
• Focus on Re-Energizing, Not Depleting: The goal is to generate energy, not exhaust yourself further.
• Observe: Notice how you feel after. You might be surprised how quickly and profoundly your energy can return when your body gets the physical engagement it craves.

This is about intentionally re-syncing your mind and body. Let your true rest be actual, stimulus-free rest. And then, consider if your symptoms might resolve or lessen with intentional, even if initially brief, movement.

Know Someone Struggling with Depression? Here’s Some Advice for Support People“

If you’re supporting someone in a shutdown state:

• Offer a calm, non-anxious, grounding presence. Your regulation can be a resource.
• Offer a gentle hug or physical comfort if welcomed and appropriate.
• Use validating words: “I see this is hard,” “You’ve been through so much,” “I don’t need to fix it; I’m just here with you.”
• Help them access gentle connecting and/or mobilizing practices if they’re open to it, without pressure.

A Crucial Reminder: You Are Not Broken, Your Symptoms Make Sense

There’s a protective purpose in all our nervous system states. Shutdown is your system doing its best to keep you safe based on its current assessment of resources and threats. With compassion, understanding, and the right kind of support—sometimes deep rest, sometimes gentle connection, and sometimes re-energizing movement—it can learn new ways of responding.

Key Takeaways:

1. Permission & Compassion First: Always start by giving yourself permission to be where you are. This often opens the door to regulation. Focus on nurturing your system, not “fixing” it.
2. Titrate Gently: When moving out of acute shutdown, introduce connection and movement in tiny, manageable drops, always listening to your body.
3. Consider the Movement Factor: For prolonged low energy, once initial safety is felt, experiment with intentional physical movement. True rest is vital, but so is physical engagement for overall well-being. Your body might be craving it more than you realize.

Healing isn’t linear. By honoring your nervous system’s needs, creating safety, and being open to different paths to re-engagement, you make space for authentic vitality to emerge.

Looking for support in healing anxiety and depression through a nervous system lens?

Want a clear, personalized path out of shutdown, anxiety, or depression? RESTORE, our 1:1 coaching program offers a whole-human approach to help you understand your symptoms and create a tangible, personalized path towards healing. We don’t just help you understand why you’re struggling, we support you in getting clear on exactly what you need to do to start healing. Book a free discovery call today.

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Disclaimer: This article is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or qualified mental health provider with any questions you may have regarding panic attacks or any medical condition