Letting Go Good: Navigating Grief With Our Kids
Episode 89: Spotify | Apple Podcasts | YouTube
View transcript on Buzzsprout
In this deeply personal episode, Amanda shares the story of saying goodbye to her dog Cooper, a companion of 12.5 years, and walks us through the dual experience of grieving herself while supporting her four-year-old son through his first real loss. Through honesty, presence, and practical emotional tools, she models what it means to show up in heartbreak—and how we can use even the hardest moments to build resilience in ourselves and our children.
What We Cover in This Episode
- A personal story of grief and what it means to “let go good”
- How kids process grief differently than adults (and why that matters)
- What to say (and not say) to young children navigating death
- Five supportive tools for helping kids through big emotional transitions
When Grief Arrives, So Does the Opportunity to Teach Emotional Resilience
Grief is hard enough to carry alone. But what happens when you’re carrying it with a child? In today’s episode, Amanda shares how she supported her son through the passing of their beloved dog—and what that experience required of her as a parent, a practitioner, and a human in pain.
The episode begins with a vulnerable reflection on Amanda’s relationship with her dog Cooper and the decision to say goodbye. From there, it shifts into real-time parenting tools: how to talk to kids about death, why simple and honest language matters, and how children naturally regulate emotions through creativity and play.
If you’re a parent, caregiver, or anyone supporting a young person through loss—this episode is a powerful reminder that grief doesn’t have to be traumatizing. It can be connective, meaningful, and even magical—when held with intention and care. Here’s a brief summary of some of what this episode walks through.
Regulation Before Words
When Amanda’s family said goodbye to their dog, their four-year-old needed help understanding what was happening. But what mattered most in that moment wasn’t explaining grief—it was modeling regulation. Before kids can process through language, they respond to nervous system cues. Amanda’s ability to stay present, even in her own sadness, provided the foundation for her child’s emotional safety.
Less Explanation, More Presence
We often think we need the “right” words to help kids through hard things. But what kids actually need is co-regulation. Amanda sat with her son, acknowledged the pain, and allowed him to be exactly where he was without rushing or fixing. Grief isn’t solved with logic. It’s moved through with connection.
Grief Is a Skill We Can Learn Together
Our kids learn how to grieve by watching us. And many of us are learning in real time, too—especially if grief was rushed, ignored, or shamed in our own childhoods. Moments like this one are where we rewrite those scripts, together. Not by doing it perfectly, but by doing it presently. Amanda didn’t have all the answers in that moment. What she had was her breath, her presence, and the willingness to be there with him. This is what nervous system-informed parenting looks like—not perfection, but regulation. You don’t have to fix the grief. You just have to show up regulated enough to hold space for theirs.
Three Tangible Takeaways
- Children grieve through play and creativity. Make space for repetition, curiosity, and expression. That’s how they process big feelings.
- Your regulation matters more than the right words. Your ability to stay grounded gives your child a safe place to land emotionally.
- Grief is a teaching moment. Don’t shield your kids from sadness—support them through it. That’s how we build emotional resilience.
Looking for more personalized support?
- Book a FREE discovery call for RESTORE, our 1:1 anxiety & depression coaching program (HSA/FSA eligible & includes comprehensive bloodwork)
- Join me inside the Regulated Living Membership, a mental health membership and nervous system healing space (sliding scale pricing available)
- Join my Release Class – Monthly guided nervous system regulation class
- Order my book, Healing Through the Vagus Nerve today!
- Download free resources here
*Want me to talk about something specific on the podcast? Let me know HERE.
Disclaimer: This article is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or qualified mental health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.
