Why Different Tools Work for Different Nervous System States (Different States Series – Part 1)
Episode 119: Spotify | Apple Podcasts | YouTube
View transcript on Buzzsprout
Ever wonder why a breathing exercise that works for your friend makes your own anxiety worse? The problem isn’t you – it’s that we’ve been treating nervous system regulation like it’s one-size-fits-all.
In this episode, Amanda kicks off the five-part “Different States Series” by explaining explains how each state—activation, freeze, shutdown, and regulation—has a unique physiological and psychological blueprint, and why that means your tools need to match your state.
What We Cover in This Episode
- The four primary nervous system states and how they function
- Why the same tool can help in one state and harm in another
- The difference between reactive regulation and reactive resourcing
- How to start identifying your state with more clarity and compassion
Regulation Is Not One-Size-Fits-All
Amanda reframes a common experience: when a tool doesn’t “work,” it’s not necessarily the wrong tool—or that you’re using it wrong. It might just not be the right tool for the state you’re in. She walks through how activation, freeze, shutdown, and regulation each come with distinct changes in physiology and psychology—and therefore require different kinds of support.
She compares this to physical injury: you wouldn’t treat a sprain and a fracture the same way. The same goes for your nervous system.
Quick Breakdown of the Four Nervous System States
Activation – Heart racing, thoughts spinning, tension in the body. Your system is in sympathetic mode, ready to move or act. You’ll need tools that help discharge excess energy, like movement or shaking, before layering in calming practices.
Freeze – Feels like being stuck with one foot on the gas, one on the brake. Your body is immobilized but internally spinning. The goal here is gentle movement, not forceful action—tools that support thawing without overwhelming.
Shutdown – Heavy, disconnected, numb. The dorsal vagal system is online. Here, tools should be gentle and mobilizing, not more slowing or sedating, to help you reengage safely with yourself and your environment.
Regulation – Steady, present, connected. In this state, the focus is on savoring and deepening, not fixing. Tools include creativity, connection, gratitude, and embodiment.
Why Tools Land Differently in Different States
Amanda illustrates this with the example of an extended exhale breath. While this technique can support downregulation in mild activation, it can backfire during a panic state or deepen shutdown if misapplied. Context and state-awareness are essential.
Inside Regulated Living offering, Amanda helps clients learn how to map their nervous system states and match tools accordingly—because guessing leads to discouragement, and understanding builds trust.
Regulation vs. Resourcing
She defines two powerful categories of reactive support:
- Reactive Resourcing – Staying with a dysregulated state while offering your system support. This might look like shifting your to-do list on a low-capacity day or adding warmth and movement in freeze.
- Reactive Regulation – Using tools to shift your physiological state. These might include breathwork, vision drills, or walking when you need to downshift from high activation or upshift from collapse.
Both are useful, and the goal is to choose intentionally, not compulsively. Amanda reminds us that regulating doesn’t always mean forcing calm—it’s about honoring what your system truly needs.
These Tools Are Scaffolding, Not the Whole House
Amanda offers a crucial reminder: in-the-moment tools are essential, but they aren’t the deeper healing work. They are scaffolding—temporary support while you build something more stable. Without deeper change in patterns, environments, and beliefs, no tool will be enough long-term.
Inside Restore, our coaches supports clients in making those foundational changes—so their lives support regulation naturally, without needing to pull from their toolkit all day, every day.
Three Tangible Takeaways
- Different nervous system states need different tools. There is no one-size-fits-all when it comes to regulation. Matching tools to your state creates more relief and less shame.
- You can choose between resourcing and regulation. You don’t always have to shift—sometimes, staying with and supporting is the most powerful move.
- Tools are temporary support, not the full solution. The real healing comes from deeper changes. Tools help you get there—but they’re not the finish line.
Looking for more personalized support?
- Book a FREE discovery call for RESTORE, our 1:1 anxiety & depression coaching program (HSA/FSA eligible & includes comprehensive bloodwork)
- Join me inside the Regulated Living Membership, a mental health membership and nervous system healing space (sliding scale pricing available)
- Join my Release Class – Monthly guided nervous system regulation class
- Order my book, Healing Through the Vagus Nerve today!
*Want me to talk about something specific on the podcast? Let me know HERE.
Disclaimer: This article is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or qualified mental health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.
